What if there might be a way to feel less afraid during this time of pandemic and social unrest?

How much time do you spend each day scrolling through social media or watching/reading news outlets?

Has this amount of time increased during the pandemic?

How do you feel right now?  

Honestly, stop and think about it. 

Are you anxious? Upset? Sad? Angry? Afraid? Content? Excited?

Sit quietly for a moment and take stock of yourself, then write it down, including today’s date.

Many of us use daily news sources to keep up with what’s going on in our world.

Many turn to social media to stay in touch with family and friends, as our source of news on current events, or for an escape from our day.

But, excess time spent on these things, especially when coupled with a lack of time spent alone with God, will have a negative influence on you.

During his sermon yesterday, our pastor issued a challenge to the congregation.  (It felt impromptu.  I don’t think this was something he planned as part of his Sunday message.  This was something the Holy Spirit laid on his heart in the moment).

He first mentioned it as an aside…something like, “By the way, we ought to be spending more time each day focused on God rather than on watching the news…more time reading the Bible than reading the paper.”

To me, his point was that we had to keep our eyes on God so we don’t drown in all the negativity around us right now, especially as portrayed by the news media.

Our pastor mentioned it a few times in the beginning of his sermon, then he stopped and issued a formal challenge:

Spend more time with God this week than you do looking at the news…and let me know about it.

In my life, this means less time on social media, especially Facebook.

I can’t tell you how many hours a day I waste scrolling Facebook posts.  (Actually, I could tell you if I’d used the Screen Time control in my iPhone settings. It’s turned on, but I rarely look at the data…guess I’ll have to start using it this week). 

Consequently, Facebook is also my source for news, and that’s scary because that means I’m getting information mostly secondhand, from another person’s post rather than directly from a news outlet…which may or may not be more unbiased and credible, if I’m being honest.  

(By the way, that’s exactly how I learned about George Floyd’s murder, through a Facebook friend’s comment about not being able to breath.  I didn’t understand the reference, and it was still a little while before I actually found out what happened and connected it back to the post).

So, I accept my pastor’s challenge and offer it to you as well: spend more time with God each day than you do on social media or news outlets.

Try it for at least a week.  Let’s see if it makes a difference. 

As we go through the week focusing more on God, pay attention to yourself and how you feel, how you react to things, how you respond to people, etc., especially compared to right now, before you start the challenge.

Does your stress level change?  Your outlook?  Your focus?  

What has God said to you this week?  (You may be surprised to hear from Him again or maybe for the first time once you’ve cleaned out some of the excess noise).

I’m going to try to share each day how I’m doing in the challenge.  I’d like to hear from you, too. Please comment here or contact me through the blog’s “Contact” link, and let me know how things are going. I’ll try to follow up through the week with my own updates as well as any tips and tricks I’ve found helpful.

A Call to Prayer

Tomorrow morning at 8am Eastern Time join me in praying for America.

I mean at 8am, stop what you are doing and get on your face.

Pray for the family and friends of George Floyd.

Pray for Derek Chauvin, his family and his friends.

Pray for the other officers who were present when Mr. Floyd was murdered – their family and friends

Pray for the police officers and their families across the nation

Pray for the government officials local and national

Pray for the protestors

Pray for the rioters

Pray for the business owners who have lost or damaged business.

Pray for our children and our future.

Pray for change.

Pray for a heart like God’s. Pray to love like He loves.

I’m not asking you to sign up for anything. I am not asking you to prove that you did it. You know we need to do it just as well as I do. I’m not going to go Live because I’ll be on my face crying out to God.

Will you join me in pray for our country? Tomorrow morning at 8am. Set a reminder on your phone.

When I Sin and Blame it on My Kids

Ethan’s upstairs doing school work on the desktop. Calling me because he needs help. Emery’s downstairs doing school work on the laptop. Calling me because she needs help. I’m in the dining room reading scripture for this week’s Bible study lesson.

I advise them to work as far as they can on their own or try to figure it out and keep going.  I promise I’ll help in a little while.  

But I keep working.  I want to get done with this lesson.  I want to move on to the next thing on my check list – laundry, dinner prep, vacuuming…heck, I may even get to take a shower today!  

But they keep calling me.  I go upstairs to help Ethan.  I go back downstairs to help Emery.

Repeat all day, 4 days a week since their school began assigning new virtual learning after spring break.  

The tipping point comes.  

{Wasn’t it inevitable?}  

I lose my temper.  I raise my voice.  I go on a rant.  My heartbeat accelerates.  I feel my face getting hot.  I knit my brow together and glare at whoever is unlucky enough to be closest to me at the time…

Then, God reminds me that my quiet time with Him is supposed to be earlier in the day…before the kids get up and start their day and need me to be their mommy.  

We’ve already settled this, He whispers.  

And I know He’s right.  We settled this.  I submitted to His will: Give God my time early in the morning, and the daytime when my family is at home belongs to them.

But, I’ve gotten slack.  I’ve been lazy.  I wanted to sleep in.  I can do my Bible study while they’re doing school work, I rationalized.  I’ll have free time when they have screen time.

Then, God called me out, and I realized – How dare I get angry with my children for needing and wanting my attention when I’m trying to do my Bible study that I should have gotten up early and done while the house was calm and quiet and no one needed me.

I’m actually being selfish when I ignore my children under the guise of studying the Bible.  Should I even go so far as to say I’m being sinful?

Daytime, when they are awake and home with me, is their time.  They deserve my attention and affection during that time.  After all, I wanted to be a mom.  Taking on this responsibility was my choice.  Giving them attention and affection when they need it is part of that responsibility.

Quiet time, when I fill up with the fullness of God, is in the early morning.  Darkness outside.  Silent house.  Just me at the table with my Bible and my journal.

So, where’s the balance? After all, I’m always preaching about how important it is to find balance.

Honestly, they don’t need or deserve every bit of my undivided attention or direction.  That wouldn’t be good parenting either.

They need their own time – to learn to occupy themselves, to be bored and learn what to do about it…

And of course there’s housework for…

My point?

When I neglect my quiet time with Jesus, when I refuse the time he has already appointed for me and convicted me of…

AND I try to force it into the time and space where I am supposed to be mommy…

I am at fault.

This is my sin, not my children’s.

On a practical note, this will look different for you depending on your situation:

  • Moms who work full time outside the home
  • Moms of infants
  • Moms who work full time at home
  • Moms of older kids or teenagers
  • Single moms
  • Moms who are caregivers (or an elderly parent or sick partner or child, etc)
  • Moms who stay at home with small children
  • Moms who home-school

The list of different situations you can find yourself in as a mom are infinite.  But, I don’t think this changes the issue.  It is our responsibility to give them the attention and affection they are supposed to have from us as their mothers.

How to Survive the New Normal

The New Normal.  That’s what we’re calling what’s happening right now.

It started March 11, the last day of school in our district.  It became “real” March 31, the first day the stay-at-home order was in effect in our state.

Everyone talks about the new normal.  We know what it means: the way we’re living during the pandemic with churches, schools, libraries, restaurants, and parks closed.  With people wearing masks and plastic gloves to the grocery store.  With people having virtual visits with their doctors.  With people working from home and having staff meetings on Zoom.

What’s your new normal look like?

For me, it’s been about finding balance.  I can’t lean too far to the left or to the right or the boat will flip over.  I gotta keep it in the center.

At our house, our attempts at finding balance during the new normal have looked like this:

1. We try to keep our lives and our schedule as close to what they used to be as possible.

2.  We try to embrace the changes we’ve experienced – things being added to and taken from our lives.

You could try to keep your life and schedule as close to the same by…

  • waking up in the morning around the same time you used to; going to bed at night around the same time.
  • washing your face every morning and every afternoon; taking a shower every day.
  • eating like you normally eat; don’t go crazy with a lot of junk food and sweets.
  • having meals at normal times.
  • emphasizing more time playing outside, building with LEGO (my kids love LEGO), drawing, reading, or writing, and less time on screens or social media.

You could embrace new things and changes by…

  • taking a walk, riding bikes, playing a board or card game, or watching movies together everyday (hey, we have a lot more free time now, right?)
  • eating a picnic lunch outside.
  • wearing pajamas all day.
  • tackling that home improvement project you’ve been putting off.

Like many people, I’ve chosen to keep some parts of my old, daily routine the same in the new normal even though I don’t have to do so.  I change out of my pajamas and wash my face in the morning and at night.  Continuing to do these things makes me feel better.

I have a friend who puts on her make-up every day although she isn’t leaving the house for work anymore.

Some people still drive to Starbucks for their morning coffee even though they no longer have a commute to work.

A few friends still wake up at their regular time for Bible study or their morning job even though they could do it later in the day since they’re currently at home with their children.

Honestly, the new normal isn’t like the life we were used to.  Lots of plans have changed.  We can’t do a lot of things we used to be able to do.  But I think we can figure our how to keep our wits about us and push through until this thing is over.  And I have faith that it will be over.

 

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Image Credit: PhDmind Blog

 

What To Do When God Changes Your Plans

I wiped the slate clean on April.

Alright, it was a dry-erase board rather than a slate, but I wiped off what little plans we had in April and rewrote the calendar for May.

Our April calendar was just about blank anyway.  Was yours?

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April had some dates marked, but they were mostly Zoom meetings the kids or I had scheduled for school.

Our March calendar was another story though. The month of March was completely planned out before the world shut down.

When I wiped the March calendar clean to replace it with April, I wiped away events that never happened.

Events were planned alright…

A date night for my birthday.

A weekend beach trip.

Class pictures with my students.

My kids’ first school dance.

Field trips to the zoo and Carowinds.

But when those days in March came and went, I drew black slashes through those boxes to cross them off.

I cross off each day on my calendar, but I’ve never crossed off so many dates with scheduled events that didn’t happen.

And never will.

All those plans we made!  All that effort spent!

I hear God saying, “You can make your plans, but I am in control.”

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Image Credit: By The Spirit Band

This doesn’t mean we shouldn’t make plans for our lives.

It means that any plans we make are under God’s sovereign control.  If He purposes to change the plans we’ve made, we have to go with it.

It may take prayer and time to get our hearts to a place of acceptance, and that’s ok. Prayer is time spent with our Father, the one in control, and that is never wasted time or effort.

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Image Credit: Bible Verses To Go

Pray to accept His will.

Pray to understand His will.

Pray to obey His will.

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Image Credit: Happy Wonderer Blog

 

 

Waiting on God

God should have answered me by now.  I’d been waiting on His input for…how long?  A few weeks? And it wasn’t a life-changing decision.  Just something small.

But He was silent.

And I wanted to know what to do.   Do I say yes, or do I say no?

Read the rest of my very first guest post and find out how God answered me.

Thank you to Misty Oerther for the opportunity to write a post for her Waiting for Sticky Notes series.

 

All I Have To Do Is…

When I stumble, it is because I chose it. When I lose my temper, get angry, become overwhelmed, get upset, I have chosen to do so.

It isn’t what God wants for me or offers me.

He offers me great peace.

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Image Credit: pinimg.com

He offers to make my feet sure.

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Image Credit: Routine Bible

He wants me to rejoice.

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Image Credit: pinimg.com

When I don’t live every second of my life according to this promise of peace, it is because I have chosen to look away from Him.

I have chosen to focus on my desires. My problems. My fears.

Instead, He wants me to focus on Him. He has given me His word so I can read and learn how to live the way He directs. He has made it clear and easy to understand what to do.

When asked which commandment was the most important, Jesus answered, “And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.” (Mark 12:30 ESV)

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Image Credit: pinimg.com

This is all I have to do.

My heart, soul, mind, and strength are all of me. They make up everything that I am. If all of me is looking at God, I will not stumble. I won’t get angry, frustrated, overwhelmed, or upset.

I have to pray that God keeps me from stumbling. It is my responsibility to read the Word and treasure it in my heart. It is my privilege to meet with God in prayer so He can write His word on my heart.

If I take advantage of the opportunity for a relationship with God that He has promised, I can begin to focus all that I am on the Lord my God, the one who is my Master and who has authority over my life.

Prayer – Privilege or Chore?

Ask God to settle in your heart what a privilege it is to pray.  Ask Him to move you past the duty (“I have to pray”) to the privilege (“I have the freedom to pray.”)  He is Emanuel, God with us, and He wants to talk with us.

Because He is Emanuel and wants to spend time with His children, our prayer times should be seen as an advantage, a benefit, an opportunity.

We are at liberty to pray to our Creator.  He has given us favor to do so.  Even more, He has assured us that He hears our prayers.  In Jeremiah 29:12-13, for example, the Lord says, “When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I’ll listen. When you come looking for me, you’ll find me.”  (MSG)

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Image Credit: Julie K. Gillies

A line in the hymn, “What a Friend We Have in Jesus” sums up my point: What a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer.

We are afforded the opportunity to talk with God.  To listen to God.  To be close to God.

When we talk to God, we have the privilege of knowing who we are talking with.  We know His name.  We are able to call Him friend.  We are able to call Him Father.

We have the freedom to make requests of Him:  Seek me.  Save me.  Teach me.  Heal me. 

We have the benefit of knowing He is always near, never far.

We have the advantage of time in quiet and stillness with Him.

Honestly, we can talk with Him anytime or anywhere because He is ever-present.

He desires us to talk with Him.  Sit with Him.  Cry to Him.  Lay our cares on Him.  Listen to Him.  Know Him.

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Image Credit: Shelbie-mae.com

Let us come to a place in our lives where we genuinely acknowledge the privilege = we are able to pray to God and have the confidence that He hears us.

Ask God to reveal your heart to you.  Do you see time with Him as a duty?  Something to be accomplished every day?  Checked off your list of tasks?  Is your time with God calculated?  Something you feel you must do to gain a desired outcome or response?

If this is where you are, don’t be discouraged.  Everyone has to start somewhere.

Or maybe you thought you already moved past this point and can’t figure out how you got back here.

Don’t let this get you down.  We go through seasons.  Life circumstances change.

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Image Credit:  Miracle Channel

The important thing to do is to realize when you find yourself in that place so you can pray and ask God for help.

Ask God to move you past the view that you have a duty to fulfill.  Ask Him to show you that you have been given freedom to enjoy something of a higher value: a relationship with God.  This plea for a deeper more genuine relationship is pleasing to God, and He will surely change your heart.

 

 

A Giveaway and a Book Review

You definitely need to read Confident Moms Confident Daughters by Maria Furlough if you’re a woman who is influential in the life of a girl: a daughter, niece, granddaughter, student, church youth group member, etc. Maria makes it clear that the answer to the problem of how to be more confident for ourselves and our daughters lies in our relationship with our Heavenly Father.  She supports her assertion with biblical scripture and her own life experiences.  She also uses expert testimony from various areas to support what she has to say about different aspects of identity and biblical confidence based on our identity in Christ.

As I read through the book, it felt like Maria and I were sitting across from each other having coffee and talking – the tone was so comfortable and conversational.  She truly shared her passion for God and family as she explored the topics of female body image, insecurity, and modeling godly confidence for the young women in our lives.

The book includes details from Maria’s own life experiences to help the reader see where she is coming from.  In addition, she discusses nutrition and physical activity among other topics related to body image.

I was concerned that the book wouldn’t be relevant for me at this time as my daughter is six.  Each chapter ends with a series of questions, and the readers are encouraged to discuss these with our daughters.  Upon first read-through of the questions for Chapter 1, for example, I felt they were over my daughter’s head – not age-appropriate.  However, I came to realize as I read further that I could adjust the wording of some and talk through a few with her right now.  Others, I can save for later.  Overall, because of my daughter’s young age, I am viewing the book as my preemptive strike!  I may not have these concerns with my daughter at this time, but they are certainly coming soon.  I can learn how to be more confident in my identity in Christ now so that I can begin modeling that for her immediately.  Some of the other information – such as Maria’s list of “Signs Your Daughter is Struggling (or Thinking about It)” – I’ll keep in my back pocket, so to speak, for when the time comes.

I honestly believe that every woman who has an influential relationship with a young woman would read this book.  It is so important to me, that I’m giving you the opportunity to win a FREE copy.

There are two ways to enter the giveaway –

  1. Like this post and leave a comment telling me about the girl or young lady in your life.
  2. Find me on Facebook at Heather Murdock Hooks and find the Facebook live video I posted about the book.  Like and share that post and leave a comment telling me about the girl of young lady in your life.

* Get your “name in the hat” twice if you complete one of the two ways explained above PLUS you subscribe to this blog by leaving me your email address (click on the “Follow” button to the right of this post).

Enter by 9pm Friday, August 30

Bloom Where You’re Planted

My mom always told me, “bloom where you’re planted.”  It seems similar to being “willing.”

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Image Credit: LessonsFromHome.co

When you’re willing, you want to.  You’re inclined to.  You’re ready to.  It sounds positive.  Like maybe you’re cheerful about whatever it is you’re willing to do.

To bloom where you’re planted means you’re willing to make the best of a situation – even flourish in that situation.

I think of Esther, a Jewish woman who became a queen of Persia and saved her people from a plot to have them all killed.  She bloomed where she was planted.  She was willing to act on what was right, use the position God placed her in, and save an entire group of people…even if it meant losing her own life.  (Spoiler alert – she lived!  Shew!  Read her story in the Old Testament book of Esther).

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Image Credit: SermonCentral.com

I think of Samuel, a young boy serving in the temple when the Lord came and stood and called out to him.  Samuel was willing to bring a word of prophecy from the Lord, even though the first word pointed to the death of his mentor, Eli, the priest.  Samuel bloomed where he was planted and eventually ushered in the monarchy in Israel when he anointed Saul as king.  Samuel was willing to be an obedient servant of the Lord. (Read this part of Samuel’s story in the Old Testament book of 1 Samuel chapter 3).

When we find ourselves in situations that aren’t of our choosing – a job, a move, a social situation – it is our Christian responsibility to represent our God and our relationship with Him.  We must be willing to choose Christ-like behaviors, to treat others kindly, to do the best job possible…to make the most or the best of the situation…to bloom where we are planted.

 

{ This post was written as part of Five Minute Friday’s Weekly Blog Link Up }